It started with Steve as Paul’s sister Pauline Calf emerging from the big video screen in a dress and high heels singing a song about and the guys she shagged in it. For brief moments s/he was joined by 2 dancers and comedy support from a man and a woman (Alice Lowe from Garth Marenghi). These 4 would appear with most other of Steve’s bits during the 2 hours.
After Pauline’s 15 minutes the other guy walked onto the stage and introduced himself as from Nottingham’s Art council. There then followed a rather odd 5 minutes of him having a nervous breakdown on stage accompanied by Alice as a slow moving nervous woman.
Each new appearance from Steve brought out a more entertaining character. Next up was 12 minutes of Tommy Saxondale who was there to say no to (most) drugs. Which for an aging ex-roadie wasn’t really his thing to talk about. Instead it went into a tale of a hippy girl he once fell in love with. This tale was also featured by the power of dance as the 2 lady dancers represented Tommy & the girl. He even tried to get them 2 kiss, but they wouldn’t :(
Alice and the guy then appeared for a couple of minutes as 2 singers. She made ooh noise with a lovely voice, and when it came to his turn he let out a horrible squeaky scream. A little surreal but amusing because of that.
I’m not too knowledgeable on the character of Duncan Thicket. He seems to be a geeky guy attempting to be a comedian. After some really bad jokes the funniest part happened. He introduced us to his brother who as a ventriloquist dummy. The dummy speaks at the same time Duncan scratches his top lip. As they spoke the dummy started to get more and more verbally violent with Duncan which escalated into physical violence. In the end Duncan shot the dummy.
The next bit to feature Alice and the guy had them dressed up as god and the devil who were having an argument about their romance. They ended up reconciling and even having a bit of a kiss (the devil likes women with long cloudy like beards) but Mrs God soon realised he couldn’t be trusted when a pregnant angel entered the scene.
Finishing off the first half was Paul Calf. He was in a wheelchair with a leg in a cat after a recent accident. In this chair he chased after a short skirted lady doctor and 2 other leggy ladies to the Benny Hill theme tune. It turned out his leg wasn’t really in a cast though. The lying bastard. He continued with a tale about his gypsy girlfriend and then a song and a dance featuring the cast. It turned out that as well as being a gypsy she was a scouser. Double fookin’ hell.
After the break it was time for the really good stuff. Alan Partridge is now a life coach with a program sponsored by Whiskers (which anytime this was mentioned brought up an image of a meowing cat. To some much hilarity later on in his bit). He had a special Wii type glove which he used to control his giant screen. Of course there were some S&M photos accidentally shown (which Alan insisted belonged to Ross Kemp). During a therapy session with a troubled couple Alan was using his computer and clicked yes on buying a penis extension and then write a letter to the people who sent it saying he clicked by mistake.
Alan then presented his 15 minute play based on the life of Sir Thomas More. Naturally many things went wrong during the performance. It was sometimes difficult to know if it was Alan fluffing up or Steve. From a recent review it was said that Steve had to keep reading his lines from cards and that was also obvious a few times last night, but it fitted in with the characters so it didn’t matter too much.
For the finale Steve came back as himself, or himself in a 1920s/30s style singing a song about how he had a normal childhood but somehow grew up to be labelled a c**t by some people. He then crooned about how we’ve all got a bit of c**t inside of us as the rest of the cast danced around and produced those 4 letters on the top of their umbrellas.
Whether these shows get good reviews or not I’m sure Steve will still get a tidy sum from the tour, especially as he did 2 nights at the concert hall and in a month does another at the arena.
I thought the good bits were genuinely chucklesome and worth the money. He can now go back to telly and Hollywood movies again for 10 years.